Monday, November 03, 2008

I have a nursery

I know I've been promising to post pictures, but I finally got around to it. It seems like everything takes twice as long these days, and I have a feeling that by having this baby (like I have a choice now), everything will take even longer.

Pack n' play, in our room. I paid less than half of its retail cost on Craig's list!

My aunt made this. It is amazing!

And here's the nursery! All those baskets on the bookshelf, another Craig's list deal.
I'm starting to wonder, is the rest of my life going to be me wishing I could do something (sometimes, anything) but can't because I've decided to have a baby? I mean, I want to have a baby and I want to be a mom, but I know being a parent is not exactly conducive to having one's own personal life. When will I be able to sleep through a whole night again? When will I be able to read a whole book in one afternoon? Can I still crochet and sew? And I'm very upset that I missed the whole fall migration season.
I know that how we raise the child will play a large role in what we're able to do. If I read to her everyday (and I do occasionally read to her now), hopefully she will love reading and we can spend time together reading. If we spend a lot of time outside, she may better appreciate birds and nature and then that becomes family time. If I crochet and sew, she becomes interested in crafts. That's the theory anyway. But what if I have a difficult child. They happen, often through no fault of the parent. I don't mind if the Navy Bean is interested in other stuff, as long as she engages in life. I don't expect life to stay the same. I expect it to get more challenging, more interesting and more meaningful. I expect to grow as a person. I expect my world to become so much larger than I ever thought it could. I just wonder if I'm up to the challenge, because now, it's not just my life I could potentially waste, it's hers too.


tbooty said...

you will be fine. i have no doubts that you & wes will be awesome parents to navy bean! yes, there will be compromises to the life you had "before" navy bean, but from what i hear, they're way worth it. :)

Anonymous said...

I think that the people who spend the time thinking about doing things right for their kids, even if it is sometimes worrying "omg, am I going to do the right things?", generally are doing good stuff. It's the ones who have kids without ever thinking about anything and who don't think about what's good for the child that really mess up their kids! It sounds like you and Wes have thought a lot about bringing up little Navy Bean and all that love and care will go a long way!

Also, I have to say that the frog mat you have in the nursery is ADORABLE!

And what the heck is a pack n'play, anyway. You've mentioned it before and I thought once I saw a photo, I would get it, but I'm still confused. Is it like a play pen with a cupholder on it?

Stacia said...

The pack n' play is indeed a playpen. Ours has a "bassinet" on top, which is why we're going to use it instead of the crib for the first few months (it fits next to our bed, the crib doesn't). The thing on the right is a changing area, and those cup holders, places to put diapers and wipes.

Bart's Camille said...

Having a baby does change absolutely everything in a terribly inconvenient, irritatingly wonderful way.

There will be some days you can make it through most of a book and a lot of days where you won't remember when you actually coherently read your last book. There will be best-laid plans wrecked for vacations, outings, time away. There will be lots of things you miss.

You know what though? There will be a fullness and richness and depth to your life that you could have never imagined. In the process of losing yourself, you'll find yourself. It's an amazing sacrifice that just gives back and gives back and gives back.

When you have times where you just wish you remembered the last time you shaved your legs or read even a magazine article and all the beauty of being a mom escapes you -remember that an empty nest is only 19, 18, 17, etc. years away!

thailandchani said...

She will come here with her own path in this world. You'll just gently guide her along that path... and enjoy getting to know her. :)