Missing husband found, with excellent excuse

My husband called me last night. He was very upset. Apparently, last week he was given 5 minutes to pack his stuff and head to a South American submarine, where he's been since then. No access to e-mail or phone. Since he was given very little time before he left, he was unable to let me know. He was hoping one of the guys would tell their wife who would tell me (which happened, but not until Wed, a week after he disappeared and a day before he called). So I decided to let him live, because really, there was nothing he could do about this situation.

Then we got on to the good stuff. He is very excited about having a little girl. And he wasn't that surprised. He said that he's been working around nukes so much, he doesn't know if he has any little guy swimmers left (for those of you who don't know, most of the navy is powered by nukes). But now we have to figure out a name. Unfortunately, my husband has dated a lot of women. So I tried going a more international route, which also backfired. My husband was stationed in Italy and Spain and has spent time in Germany so, there again, the good names are all gone. But I love Russia! Apparently, all Russian girl names are associated with whores (thanks James Bond!). But there are a few names we agree on, so I'll just keep working on him until he gets back, and if all else fails, I'll just fill out the birth certificate when he's not in the room.

Well, I'm off to the navy's budgeting for baby class. I can't wait to find out how much this is going to cost us (not the class, that's free, the baby). Good thing everyone I know plans on buying cute little girl clothes, otherwise this child might just go naked!