Last night, I felt a very definite kick, like a thwamp. There was no question about it. I had gotten up in the middle of night to go to the bathroom, and then I couldn't get back to sleep, so I was basically rolling from side to side, trying to get comfortable. I guess the little navy bean was getting motion sick or something, and it wanted me to just lie still already! And yesterday, I had someone rub my belly. But, at least it was someone I knew (another teacher at a school I sub at often). It was still weird. She thought I was only 3 months along, so that made me feel good too, because I do feel huge (18 weeks, 5 lbs gained).
This past week, two things happened that have really made me think about being a parent. One, I found myself standing in a completely empty room, three days in a row, with my hand over my heart, pledging allegiance to the American flag, outloud. This had always bothered me, the what to do when it's time for the pledge, but you're completely alone. I feel silly doing it, but I feel bad not doing it. But I realized that soon, I will not be alone and someone else will be watching my every action. I would rather feel silly, but display integrity, than brush it off and teach my kid disrespect.
Two, I had a friend stay with me a couple of days who has two kids of her own. Her kids are not bad, but the oldest is 3 1/2 years old, and my friend sees no point in disciplining her because she's just 3 1/2 years old. Um, because soon she's going to be 4 and then 5 and someday 10, 11 then the teenage years. She will tell her daughter to do/not do something, but not back it up. By doing that, she's teaching her daughter that she doesn't have to obey her. Which got me thinking about discipline. At one point, I even told my friend that I would have given her daughter a little (not painful, just shocking) smack on the leg. She then turned to her daughter and said, "See, you're lucky I'm your mommy because Stacia is mean." Ok then. Maybe I just want children that obey. And maybe I want to have friends who invite me to their houses because they know my children are well behaved and won't leave a disaster zone behind them (they won't). Maybe I just want children who respect me, others and themselves. Maybe I just want good kids.
5 comments:
There is no discipline, and there is age-appropriate discipline. I think what you're talking about is totally acceptable.
It's so exciting feeling the wee ones for the first time!!! David got to feel the babies kick the other day and about fell apart. There are so many more firsts ahead of you! I'm so excited for you!!!!
First of all, "little navy bean" is the best nickname ever!
Secondly, I have a question about "when it's time for the pledge." You'll have to excuse my ignorance on this - but there's a time of day when you do the pledge? Like, do they have it on loudspeakers? Is this a navy thing?
Third, it's shocking to me to hear that your friend says that she "sees no point" in disciplining her daughter because she's 3.5. That's just ridiculous. How are kids supposed to learn that there are appropriate ways to behave if there aren't rules and then consequences if you don't follow the rules (and by consequences, I don't mean hitting, because I don't think hitting teachings anyone anything). But, hello, she's 3.5 and you are the adult - it's not hard to, for example, take away a toy/not go to the park/etc. if the kid doesn't behave appropriate. I know this works because my niece is totally well behaved and that's how my sister raised her. And she's not even 3.5 years old!
The pledge is at the schools that I work at, and yes, they are on the loud speakers (as is a moment of silence, which I find totally weird).
I don't condone hitting either, but think appropriate spanking is ok on occasion. This was a situation where we were going into a building and she refused to put her shoes on. They were spending the rest of the day in the car, because they're moving, and not really anywhere for time-out, or anything to take away, which would have been my first choice.
I would say the pledge if alone. I love that the little navy bean let him/herself be known! Super cool!
Love you and talk to you Friday!
Go little navy bean!!!
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