Wednesday, January 12, 2011


It's January, and still, not normal. But I can't really explain how it's not normal. Most of the time, I'm perfectly fine. I still need to nap, to reset stuff but otherwise, I'm back to my regular routine. However, when I turn my head quickly (or sometimes, not too quickly) I can tell I'm not 100%. (Yes, this makes driving a pain in the butt.) It's kind of like those bad 80's movies, where they're at the carnival and suddenly everything is in delayed slow motion. You know things are moving more quickly than your brain is processing them. Annoying, but not a disaster anymore. I still haven't had the MRI done. They said they have plenty of spots between 1 and 4 AM!!!! Yes, I'll be right there. But, Wes will be home soon and even though I hate the thought of taking out all of my earrings again (11 earrings: they take forever to get back in), I should probably just do it.

So, overall, I'm thankful that things are the way they are. They could be much worse. The worse part is the Navy Bean. She's fine when we go places or when I leave her at the babysitters (home, mama! pointing at the door so I will leave), but at home, she has become quite clingy. I have to stay in her line of sight. And one day, while we were napping (yes, together), she started talking in her sleep. Mama go? Mama go!?! (the panic was evident) Mama go!!!! and then she started wailing. And because she was asleep, I couldn't comfort her, because I wasn't mama, I was just some person. I know she won't remember this for long (hey, why is half the neighborhood standing in my kitchen over my mom and why are those guys taking her into that truck, and who is this person who is taking me away?) I'm thankful she is only two and this won't scar her for life. But, until this happened, I told her "mama will always come back." Now, I tell her, "mama will make sure there is always someone to take care of you." And I guess that's really the best I could ever do anyway.


Deb said...

Your daughter sounds like she loves her mama. That's pretty evident from what I just read. :)

Trade Waste said...

Yeah pretty evident