Twilight zone

I was going to tell some IQ stories, but something even weirder happened. I know, how is that possible? You guys remember Charley, right? Charley, my ex, who also happened to be the best man at Wes's first marriage. Charley, the pot-head who brought out the absolute worst in me, and I in him. Charley, who has been engaged at least 4 times, yet never got married. Yeah, well, Charley is back, sorta.



Last fall, some friends of ours from TX, who also happen to live in VA, got married. Some friends of ours who still live in TX came out for the wedding, including Charley. Some of these friends stayed with us and told us a really interesting Charley story. See, Charley was dating a new woman. Nothing new there. But, there was some drama surrounding this woman. Apparently this woman was a repeated convicted felon, for identity theft and things of that nature. Our friend, a lawyer, had run a check on her, at the request of another of our friends. Turns out, there was a lot more shady stuff than she had told Charley. My friend let Charley know, and then things got weird. Apparently, Charley's girlfriend is very powerful and has some powerful family because they threatened my lawyer friend with ruining his career. If she is so powerful, how come she spent so much time in prison?

Anyway, we hadn't heard anything from Charley in a while, but we had heard that his new girlfriend treats him very well and really seems to be good for him. So, good for him. This past weekend, Wes and I got an e-mail from Charley's girlfriend. They are getting married this year and wanted our address. I replied with the usual: congrats and here's our address. She sent me a longish e-mail telling me she had really wanted to contact me before but wasn't sure how I would feel about that. She wanted us to get to know her and judge her for who she was and not what we had heard. She loved Charley sooooooo much and he's such an awesome man. He's a deacon at their church!!!! (I have to gripe about this because they are living together and not married. Yes, I've lived with a man I wasn't married to (Charley) but I wasn't a deacon. I wasn't even going to church. What kind of shady church is this?) And they would really love it if we could come out for the wedding. It would mean so much to Charley. And they wanted to know how the navy bean was.

I e-mailed back that I'm glad that Charley is doing so well and that we really just wanted what was best for him. We wouldn't be able to make it to the wedding though, because we're building a house (we have no extra money). She sent me about 6 e-mail with pictures and offered to pay for the plane tickets. Because us being there is what Charley really wants.

What!!!!!!!

Let's look at the facts. I met Charley in high school when I was hanging out with Wes. Charley and I dated for a while. He thought I liked Wes more (I did). Several years later, Charley was the best man at Wes's wedding. Several years after that, I was living with Charley and we were talking about getting married. After we broke up, he made me promise I wouldn't ever date Wes. Several years after that, I married Wes and had a baby.

Yes, I can see why Charley would want us both to be there. We have so much history!

Why does this woman want to be my new best friend? Sounds shady to me.

I'm over here!

So I haven't been here a lot, but there's a very good reason. I am a stay at home mom. Do you know what stay at home moms do? We stay at home. The end. Although I am infinitely thrilled with the cuteness of Navy Bean and all her extraordinary powers, that's what her blog is for. I do have a few IQ stories, but, quite frankly, now that I'm a mom, her level of involvement with her son depresses me. But I do have some house news.

This is the Navy Bean's room.

This is what the house looked like yesterday.
We have a roof!

This is what it looked like last weekend, when we took the kids out there.

The kids are beyond thrilled that we're building a bigger house. They really didn't believe us at first. They thought that we were looking at houses and wanted to know what they thought (like we care what they think!). They were very excited when we told them we'd already bought it (ok, not really, we don't close until it's built, but you can't explain that to kids). Strangely, when they told their mom how huge our new house was going to be, she really didn't want to talk about it. (When she left Wes, she told him that her new husband was a multi-millionaire and they were going to build a new house. They still live in a rental and the x has told Wes they are basically living on our child support.) We are very excited and Oct. cannot get here soon enough. It is torture to come back to our little rental and cook in our tiny kitchen, knowing that soon I will have a kitchen the size of, well, a lot bigger. A lot, lot bigger. Meanwhile, hope everyone is doing well.

Snip or not to snip

Wes doesn't want anymore kids. Which I understand. He has three. He wants to get snipped. I don't think I want anymore kids either, so what's the problem. I really don't know. I love the little Navy Bean so much, and if we were younger and could wait 4 or 5 years in between kids, I would probably want more. But we're already 35. His kids are 11 and 8. And I like sleep. I want to have space in between kids though. I want to be able to enjoy my time with the Navy Bean. She's in such a fun stage right now (when she's not teething). She can interact with you. You can see the light bulbs going off in her head, often one right after another. She is trying to figure stuff out. She's getting a sense of humor. Her personality is emerging. I don't want to have to put her on hold while I take care of another baby. I don't want her to have to share me. I want to spoil her. I don't really want another kid.


But I'm terrified something will happen. The Navy Bean could never be replaced. I wouldn't even want to try. But after becoming a mom, I don't know that I could stop being a mom. I don't even know if any of this makes any sense. I told Wes we should wait until she's two. It seems silly though, to wait, when I know I don't want another one. Suggestions on why him getting snipped freaks me out?